File: Oliver Contreras-Pool/Getty Images
By: Chikicha News Network
June 14, 2025 — Washington, D.C.
In a surprise executive order announced during a press conference held at a newly opened McDonald's inside Trump Tower D.C., former President Donald Trump declared McDonald’s the “official meal of the United States.”
“Let’s be honest — nobody does burgers better than America,” Trump said, holding a Big Mac in one hand and a Diet Coke in the other. “McDonald’s is American greatness in sandwich form.”
The announcement came after what insiders are calling a “high-level lunch summit” between Trump and Ronald McDonald. Witnesses reported the two dined on a 20-piece McNuggets combo and shared a McFlurry “like old friends.”
Trump praised the chain’s consistency and “tremendous ketchup,” adding that the Quarter Pounder “has more integrity than most politicians in Washington.”
🍟 “Presidential Meal Deal”
According to leaked documents, a new initiative called the “Presidential Meal Deal” will include:
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2 Big Macs
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1 Filet-O-Fish
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A supersized Diet Coke
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And a collectible Trump-themed toy (subject to availability in swing states)
Critics have questioned the nutrition of the plan, but Trump brushed off concerns, saying, “If it’s good enough for me, it’s good enough for America.”
🇺🇸 Reaction Online
Social media erupted with hashtags like #MAGAmeal and #BigMacDiplomacy. Some called it “peak America,” while others wondered if the next cabinet position would be Secretary of Sauce.
🍔 In Other Fast Food News...
Sources inside Chick-fil-A reportedly met in an emergency strategy session to rebrand their waffle fries as “Freedom Wedges.”
Disclaimer: This article is entirely fictional and meant for satirical entertainment. No actual statements or events are real.
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